Almost

I still have two exams left before I am finally free, but instead, here I am writing a few lessons learned from my first year in college.

  1. I didn’t know that I used to be uncomfortable with who I was.  I thought who I was in high school was who I would end up being for the rest of my life, but I was wrong. I haven’t changed in any way. It’s simply that I refined who I was into a perspective of my own and not of others.
  2. Grades are irrelevant. I shouldn’t have to lose my sanity because of them.
  3. Impress yourself. There’s no need to please others.
  4. Learn how to budget your money. Or don’t because money is not everything. I know for a fact that I never want it to dictate my life.
  5. 8AM classes. Don’t take them. Don’t consider taking them. Don’t even look at them.
  6. Be ambitious, not competitive.
  7. Keep good people around you. It’s up to you how you define good. For me, the good ones are the ones who make you leave a restaurant because they know you’re about to break down into tears. The ones who will walk with you late at night and patiently wait as you try to take pictures of empty roads. The ones who give you their second waffle because they know how much you love waffles. The ones who put down everything and pick up the phone when you call even though you haven’t seen them for months. Trust me. You’ll know who they are.
  8. Call your family whenever you can.
  9. Life can be lived to the fullest without having to drink or smoke anything. Substances are not substantial, just temporary pleasures.
  10. Floss. Paying out of pocket for a trip to the dentist is hella expensive.
  11. You will gain weight, but you will also learn that it doesn’t matter. It really doesn’t.
  12. Care about something or someone. Dedicate your heart because this world is just too damn big for one person to carry.
  13. Be wary of what you say. Think twice. Then one more time. And again before you speak. I learned the hard way that being open invites hurt. Sometimes it really is not worth it to speak your mind. Sometimes your feelings can be kept within and not shared.

And thus, my last lesson leads to my last blog post. I’ve been told I have a tendency of rubbing people the wrong way and that I am opinionated. I used to take pride in being fearless of my words, but now I am fearful. I don’t want to admit defeat, but I will be honest.

It really does not seem worth it to have you know how I feel and think. For you to know what I believe in. For you to be challenged by my ideas.

Because at the end of the day, people will assume and judge. People will not budge. People will be hurtful.

But this isn’t me running away. Rather this is me making a promise to listen. Instead of speaking first, I want to hear what you have to say. I’ve shifting the focus from myself to you. For the next few months, I won’t talk about myself, but rather ask about you. Maybe this promise doesn’t make sense to you, but to me it means the world for me to finally listen and hear you. 

So I bid you all adieu until I can muster up the courage to be open again.b

Until then,

Your Facebook friend who used to inundate you with daily posts

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